Meditation Techniques: Do Nothing - The Simplest Meditation Possible
How to Do Nothing When You Are Working
Maybe you are looking for a low-stress job. Maybe, you are literally looking to do nothing at work. Whatever the reason, there are ways you can make money by doing as little as possible. The trick is to find a job that you can stand and/or a job you can slack off in but still be somewhat productive (or, at least, productive enough not to get fired). You can do nothing by appearing more productive than you actually are, by hiding your productiveness, or by getting a job without putting in much effort.
Doing Nothing, and Hiding It, at Work
Play browser games.Browser games are easy to hide from prying eyes.There are a lot of browser games that you can play for free and very easily in your internet browser. You can hide these quickly if your boss or coworker walks by, by minimizing the window.
- Make sure you turn your sound down or off as not to alert people that you’re playing a game.
- Your company might have software to watch what their employees are doing on the internet. Inquire with your IT department if this is the case.
- Learn hotkeys to switch out of browsers or to close them.For example CTRL+TAB (on a Window’s machine) will switch out tabs in your browser.
- There are many free websites where you can find browser or flash games.
Get on social media sites.Social media sites are a great way to waste time without doing any work.
- Follow your favorite celebrities to catch up on popular culture news.
- Read up on what your friends are doing.
- Play minigames on social media sites.
Play on your phone.There are many, many applications on smartphones to kill time.Whatever your interests, there is probably an application for it. Here are some categories:
- Making money -- stock broker applications, auction applications
- Shopping -- many stores have applications to browse or buy
- Looking at or editing pictures
- Coloring, games, puzzles -- you can learn new skills or relieve stress through these apps
Take long lunches or client lunches.If you have a job where you interact one-on-one with clients, use them as an excuse to get out of the office. Take long lunches or tell your coworkers that you’re “taking a client to lunch.”
- To avoid suspicion, base what you are telling people on the truth. Use real client’s names and details when telling people where you are going. Say something like: “I’m going to talk with Mr. Smith about his upcoming project. We need to iron out some details.”
- Or, say something like: “I’m meeting Mindy for coffee at 1, she seems very dissatisfied with our work right now.”
Come in late, and leave early.If you can get away with it, try coming in a little bit late (not too late that someone notices) and leaving a bit early. Less time in the office is more fun time for you!
- If you have an office job, you may be able to sneak in later than if you work a job where you are more active. Try coming, or leaving, in late in ten minute increments until someone catches you.
- Use traffic as an excuse.
- If you’re asked, tell people you have an appointment or you have to rush home to do something (sign for a package, let the dog out, etc).
Listen to podcasts or watch television.These days, your favorite television network has videos online. Or, you can watch whole television series or movies through streaming services.
- You may be able to get away with wearing headphones (some companies allow their workers to listen to the radio while working). You can more easily hide that you are watching/listening to something this way.
- Remember your browser shortcuts (CTRL + TAB, or CMD + TAB) to quickly exit out of the browser if someone walks by.
- You can pretty much find a podcast on any topic you can dream of! Find something that interests you.
Looking More Productive Than You Actually Are
Write a program that does your job for you.Or, find a way to automate your job. Use technology to your advantage to do the more repetitive aspects of your job. Try things like:
- Automate your e-mail to automatically respond to frequently asked emails/questions.
- Create email templates to easily send the same requests or responses to many people.
- If you have to do the same task repeatedly, see if you can automate your job. This may be useful if you work in payment processing or accounts receivable.
- Use applications that automate things for you like online calendars and social media.
Delegate your work to others.If you work with a team, have employees, or manage interns, pass off your work onto them. You can break your work into smaller tasks to hide the fact you are working less.
- Give clear instruction and details. The clearer you are with your instruction, the fewer questions you will receive.
Consult.Consulting for a company is a great way to give people ideas but not do any of the work. The trick here is to market yourself as someone who has advice to give, and to get paid for.
- Be clear in who you are marketing to -- who do you want your clients to be?
- Be sure to be confident in what you do -- you want people to pay you!
Overestimate how long a project will take.If you have a project that you need to work on and you can set your own timetable, tell your team or your higher ups that you need a lot of time to finish it.
- The trick here is that you will eventually have to do the project, but if you give yourself way more time than you know you will need, you know you can have time to do nothing.
Work odd hours.Chances are, if you work odd or flexible hours, there will be fewer people watching over your work.. If you want to not do anything or not do much at work, work shifts where a lot of people might not be around.
- For example, you may try being a clerk for a store or hotel where you can take overnight hours.
Getting a Low-Stress Job if You Want to Do Nothing
Find something that makes you happy.There is an old adage of if you love what you do, you will never work a day in your life. Find a job that speaks to your passion, and work will not seem so bad!
- Try and make your hobby your career.Find ways to profit on whatever you like to do in your free time.
- Try to volunteer first somewhere you would like to work to gain experience, and then move your way into a paying position. You’ll be more likely to get a job this way with experience of volunteer work.
Pay someone to write your resume for you.To make yourself look like an ideal candidate for a cushy job, you may have to invest some money up front. To get an interview, you want to have the best resume possible. There are many companies out there that specialize in writing resumes and getting their clients interviews.
Get a job on campus (if you’re a college student).College jobs are often cushy and do not require much work or effort. They are often designed to allow students to study or work on homework.
- These jobs may include receptions in a residence hall or a student liaison.
- Talk to financial aid about a work study program.
Sell your bodily fluids or body parts.You can get paid for what you already produce. You can sell your blood, plasma, semen, or eggs for cash just by being healthy.
- You will have to pass a medical screening and a drug test before you can donate plasma. Donating your eggs may require more rigorous health screenings.
Get paid to sleep by being a hotel room sleep tester.You can get paid just to sleep. High quality hotels often hire individuals to test their hotel rooms for customer satisfaction.
- These jobs are highly sought after and sometimes hard to get. They are sometimes featured on online job boards.
Be a sleep study patient.You can literally get paid for someone to study your sleep habits. Universities or medical programs often are looking for volunteers or patients to study.
- Check with your local university or hospital to see if they have a study job board.
Teach English abroad.You can teach English abroad with little to no experience, or degree. Countries like China, Japan, and South Korea have high demands for teachers.
- Teaching English abroad has been often rated as a low-stress job, and it allows you to travel the world.
Work from home or remotely.Working from home allows you the freedom to wear whatever you want and may give you more opportunities to do nothing.
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