The UGLY Truth About Brad And Angelina's Split
8 Reasons Why Brangelina Is Better Than Kimye
Maybe we're just feeling a little punch-drunk after all the big news today, but a comparison is begged for here.
1.Brangelina didn't get married on a holiday weekend, thus selfishly ruining all of their friends' plans. Hello, rude!
2.Brangelina said they wouldn't get hitched until gay couples could do the same—and held off until DOMA was repealed. Kimye refused to get hitched until they could find an appropriate publication to sell their photo rights to.
3.Kanye allegedly (okay, but this is sounds like it could be true) required all guests to sign a 15-page confidentiality agreement before being graced by the light of his nuptials. Brangelina's ceremony was private. So private that we didn't even know it happened.
4.Instead of place cards, Kimye had a team of Italian stone masons engrave the name of each guest into the marble of the tabletop by their seat. We have no details about Brangelina's wedding yet, but they still win this one.
5.The showstopper of the Kimye affair? A giant gold box that contained the toilets. TMZ has yet to report on the porta-potty situation at the Brangelina fête, but we'd bet all of our dollars that the couple known for their humanitarian work didn't splurge on a gilded throne.
6.Kimye paid 0,000 to rent the fortress in Florence where they held their ceremony. Brangelina got married in their backyard. Okay, so it was a château in France, but they actually own and presumably have a personal connection with it.
7.When Brad and Angelina are away from each other, they exchange handwritten letters to stay close. Kim and Kanye Snapchat semi-nude selfies.
8.Kanye's love for Kim stems from her ability to be "the ultimate celebrity." After Angelina had her preventive mastectomy last year, Brad said that she was "absolutely heroic" and "brave, bold, and sexy." We'd take that over sex-tape-famous any day.
Score one for team Brangelina. We'd never claim that they were the poster children for down-to-earth celebrities, but things feel strangely complete with their union solidified.
Video: 8 Reasons It's Time To Let The Angelina Jolie And Jennifer Aniston Feud Die
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